Why My Mother Hates Shopping With Me And How It Relates To Our Wedding.

So, for as long as I can remember, I've been the sort of person who goes shopping and points out all the things I hate.

I'll quietly muse over the things I would buy, but the things that are atrocious to me... those get pulled off a rack and commented on (usually without mercy) to whoever I'm shopping with. That cute pink top with the perfect v neckline and the adorable cartoon pug. I'll smile at it, check the price and then probably convince myself I don't need it. The lime green and mud brown striped parachute pants that should be in the clearence rack, but somehow found their way in amongst the dress slacks, those I'll wax poetic about until I find the next atrocity.

My mother hates it.
School shopping with me was probably one of her least favorite things in the world. I have a feeling when I hit my senior year of highschool she did a little happy dance when she realized it was the end of my annoying shopping habits.

But as I went about altering and rewriting the ceremony script for our upcoming wedding, I found that I was doing it again. Instead of focusing on things that worked, I was writing things that were utterly ridiculous. (Now don't get me wrong, there are references to Doctor who, and the zombie apocalyps, it's not your standard fare to begin with.)

I think it's just how I deal with things that don't come easy. And who knows, maybe it helps knock some good ideas around in my head.

A Peek into the Weirdness that are My Dreams.

You know how dreams rarely make sense?

A few nights ago I had a dream and knew immediately, I had to write it down and save it for posterity.

Ryan Gosling (from young Hercules) was fighting King Kong on a barge in the middle of the Coos Bay. While this was occurring, I was racing through a crowd of mannequins set up on the shoreline, frantically searching for the perfect brown bowler hat among the plethora of random hats atop the mannequins’ heads. While there were many different types of hats on these mannequins, they all wore the same coat because one of the mannequins was Sherlock (of the Bandersnatch Cumberbund varietal). The magic of the perfect Brown Bowler was keeping Sherlock frozen as one of the mannequins and I had to get to him and remove it so that he could save Mr. Gosling (and my home town) from the menace of King Kong.

And then, as with most of my dreams, the ending (the one that I remember anyway) was super random.

Suddenly, Reece Witherspoon, from The Importance of Being Earnest, was handing me a cup of tea in a beautiful English garden and telling me that what set us apart from Mrs. Snootywilkins was that we didn't leave our lesson plans out.