Death by Yellow

It’s the newest craze it seems… if you’re a bird.

Earl drives a bright yellow Nissan X-Terra. Its color should make it pretty hard to miss, right? Well apparently birds can’t see the color yellow. It’s almost as if, things that are painted yellow simply aren’t seen by those pesky disease-ridden things.

In the past few weeks, we’ve had two birds successfully commit suicide by flying into the car. The first didn’t do much. It died, nuff said. The second hit the headlamp on the passenger side, exploding in to a cloud of feathers. I honestly wondered if we’d hit a pillow instead of a pigeon.

But these two that have succeeded have not been alone in their attempts. Apparently “Death by Yellow” is all the rage (also sounds like an awesome band. name if I ever join one I’ll suggest it). I think that these birds need some help. Taking their own lives is not the answer to their problems. I’ve written an open letter to any birds contemplating suicide.

Dear Birds,

There is hope in your lives, whether you accept to acknowledge it or not. Don’t look for the easy way out if you’re feeling discouraged, if you can’t pay the mortgage on your nest, or if your ladybird is chirping your ear off. Know that there is always someone willing to help. Find a birdbath and talk it out with friends. But if you do feel it’s necessary to die by yellow…. FIND A CAB AND STAY AWAY FROM ME!